3 minute read

September 2, 2004, 11:43 PM

Yeah, when it gets slow as the night continues on, we get a tad silly. Our scanners at the Service Desk are handheld and wireless, and are somewhat gun-shaped. And when an associate held up an item so I could scan it to find out what department it was in, I kind of hammed it up a little. Took my scanner gun, held it with both hands, aimed, and fired at the item in question. Zap.

When I saw the associate was amused, I hammed it up a little more, posing and jokingly saying, “This is the Service Desk! Step away from the returns and keep your hands up!”

Yeah, we’re nutty. Good, harmless fun. And it works even better with a telxon (pronounced TEL-a-zon), since those things have a longer business-end than our scanners do.

As you can tell, I had a really good day today. I also went over to SmartStyle (in-store hair place) on my lunch break and got my ears lowered. And just to illustrate how much hair I needed to get cut off, I now have a very neat and attractive haircut (can’t keep the girls off me!). But before lunch, I was so shaggy that I could have made great money renting myself out as a mop. I was really shaggy.

And that worked out really well, since I got in and out of there in less than 30 minutes, leaving me some time to quickly buy a lunch and spend 30 minutes yakking to coworkers.

And then when I got back up to the Service Desk, everyone was like, “Is it just me or did you get a haircut?” Funny how that goes when you head over to SmartStyle on your lunch.

Meanwhile, since word broke out in July about my Web site’s Online Store, and the “supplies” that I sell, it’s interesting how things get twisted around. It seems that my store has quickly become legend, and developed a life of its own. The thing that generates the most talk is the Photo 2 thong, understandably. Still, the things I hear are amusing. One person asked me why I had photos of myself in thong underwear on there. This, by the way, is where you find out who’s actually seen the site and who’s going strictly on word-of-mouth. Still, I set him straight, telling him that they had it backwards. I’m on the underwear – the underwear’s not on me. The latter, you see, no one wants to see. The former, based on sales, seems to be a pretty popular concept. Then there’s the other one that said that I only sold thong underwear. Also inaccurate, and I actually deliberately back-burner the thongs on my store in favor of giving the shirts the top slot. Besides, the only link to an all-thong page is deeply buried in a navigational menu in the store.

So that amuses me.

Speaking of which, I need to turn the store for the fall and winter. Also, I still wish I had some sort of long pants in my store. I’d love to design some sort of pants where I could put a design up the leg or something. I’d also love to have those shorts with the writing on the butt. A lot of people have requested that. Also thong sandals, aka “flip flops”. A lot of people have asked about that, too.

Meanwhile, I’ve been reading about vintage retail. You know how when you look at old photo albums and yearbooks how you see how people used to dress and wear their hair? Considering how business not only sets style trends but also follows it, and is constantly reinventing itself in appearance, it’s interesting to see photos of old stores. Plus see brands that you don’t see anymore. It’s neat.

Web site: Retailers from Woolworth to Wal-Mart

Song: Breda rehab take-off sound

Quote: "Step away from the returns, and keep your hands up!"