“Is blue the color of good fortune?”

Scooter in blueWell? Is blue the color of good fortune? So far, it seems to be so. As many on JMU’s campus have known, when my scooter was fitted out with red wheels and red handlebars, I had six accidents within a few weeks! However, when I lost a considerable chunk out of the rear wheel, the scooter went into a temporary retirement, and new wheels were ordered immediately. I don’t know what it is, but when I got the new blue wheels and black handlebars, my accident record has improved dramatically. At the time of this writing, I have not had any accidents on the new wheels. Now watch… I say this, and next week (I’m writing this on a Friday night), I’ll have twelve accidents, end up in Rockingham Memorial Hospital, and total my scooter. Still, the blue wheels seem to have held up better than the red ones. And to be honest with you… though I didn’t like the pain associated with fall number six, I did kind of appreciate the loss of a part of the wheel. You see, I wanted a scooter fitted out in blue to begin with, but all they had was red and green at Vans Skatepark. So I got red, and now with this accident, I finally have the blue scooter I’ve always wanted…

Date posted: September 30, 2000

Notes: I don't usually post readers' comments, but this message really takes the cake. This was left in my guest book, and I found it pretty funny. This is posted verbatim from the guest book.

Name: Chris Russell
E-mail address: crussell@vans.org
Homepage URL: http://www.vans.com
Where are you from?: Washington D.C.
How did you find this site?: Word of Mouth


Mr. Schumin,

My name is Chris Russell and I'm an advocate for the Vans Scooter company based here in Washington. I must admit that your dispariging [sic] remarks about our red wheeled scooters (official U.S. patent code rws2867@19) troubled me some. I will also warn you that your remarks have troubled our legal department as well. You should expect to receive [sic] your subpoena to appear before Virginia's seventh circuit court in the next 3 to 5 business days. In the meantime, Congress, at my company's request, is pushing legislation to make "the slander of red wheeled vehicles" a capital crime punishable by death. You can expect the proceedings to be swift and harsh ending in your ultimate demise at which point your web site and all it's intellectual property will become roperty [sic] of the Vans Corporation. For now I would advise you to edit the content of your "Quotes" to avoid further legal action.

Thank You for your Time,
Christopher Russell, esquire

Upon reading this, you will notice multiple spelling errors, and plus a glaring error in what kind of company Vans is: they don't make scooters!