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What on earth happened here?

August 20, 2005, 6:10 PM

Check this out:

Crushed shopping cart at Wal-Mart in Waynesboro

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Categories: Homestar Runner, Walmart

You never know who you’ll meet…

July 30, 2005, 11:08 PM

Friday at work was interesting. You know how you never know who you’ll see at Wal-Mart? I met a famous artist at the self-checkouts on Friday. Specifically, I met P. Buckley Moss. I recognized her initially, thinking, I think that’s P. Buckley Moss, but didn’t ask the question. Then I saw the screen on the pin-pad where she signed. P. Buckley Moss. Wow. I hadn’t seen her in some time. But she remembered me, and also remembered Mom, since both of us went to some of her art signings at her barn in Waynesboro, which is actually a converted apple barn in a nice little neighborhood. That was neat. You never know who you’ll see come through Wal-Mart. I’ve met Reo Hatfield, a Waynesboro city councilman and an instrumental player in the truce between the Hatfields and the McCoys, and I’ve also met Moreko Griggs, who made headlines when he was named as Waynesboro’s first black valedictorian, and then was changed to being one of three valedictorians, next to two white women. That story is outlined here. So all in all, it’s neat.

Then on Saturday, there was an interesting discussion in the breakroom regarding the fact that I didn’t shave for Thursday’s trip. It went like this:

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Categories: Myself, Walmart

I went to Singles Shopping… or at least tried.

July 23, 2005, 5:38 AM

I went down to Roanoke on Friday evening after work to visit the Wal-Mart on US 220, where, you may recall, I wrote in this space about “Singles Shopping”, the place for desperate singles to tie a red ribbon onto their cart and try to find true love.

So after traveling 90 miles from Stuarts Draft to Roanoke, I arrived at Wally World way down in Roanoke, only to find out that Singles Shopping was cancelled, and that they wouldn’t be having it anymore. I knew something was up as soon as I got in, considering there was no signage for the event, and saw no red-ribbon carts. I asked the greeter, who, after enthusiastically greeting me with a hearty “Welcome to Wal-Mart!” (major plus points there), told me it was cancelled. Turns out that earlier in the day, the store received a directive from Home Office in Bentonville: Do not have Singles Shopping tonight, and do not have it again. Drat. And I was looking forward to it, too. I, along with several others, put in comment cards about how we traveled distances to see this, only to find it was cancelled. Some even came from West Virginia, though from Roanoke to West Virginia isn’t as far as from Roanoke to here. All the store associates I spoke to were very apologetic about it, from the managers and right on down, since this was their great idea, and Bentonville nixed it (though I was told that some associates absolutely HATED the concept). After all, it got such wonderful press in the Roanoke Times (linked in the first entry I posted on this topic), and via the Associated Press to other papers. Jay Leno even made fun of it on his show.

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Categories: Roanoke, Walmart

Somebody called me at work for this…

July 19, 2005, 11:41 PM

It’s right around 3 PM on Tuesday afternoon, and I’m working the self-checkouts. Then one of our CSMs comes up to me and tells me that I have a call on Line 1. So I get the cashier next to me to keep an eye on the Fastlanes for a couple of minutes while I take that call, figuring it’s probably Mom or Dad with some highly pertinent information or something.

It turned out to be a fairly random individual who had heard of me and the Web site and wanted the URL, and knew where I worked. I’m thinking, why are they calling me at work?

All I have to say is, that’s odd. (And please don’t call me at work unless it has to do with me in a job-related capacity, which Schumin Web is not.)

Categories: Some people, Walmart

Wal-Mart in Roanoke – the place for desperate singles to meet and greet?

July 17, 2005, 5:58 PM

You know what’s so special about this store?

Wal-Mart on US 220 in Roanoke

This is the Wal-Mart on US 220 near Tanglewood Mall in Roanoke, Virginia. They have introduced Singles Shopping, which, according to The Roanoke Times, is “an opportunity for singles to meet while stocking up on milk, underwear, snacks and small appliances.”

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Jolt Cola: It really does exist!

July 12, 2005, 10:50 PM

I could not believe it today when I went to the 7-Eleven after work for some refreshment. Looking in the drink cooler, I found Jolt Cola. I was surprised, because I’d heard of it for so long, but had never ever seen it. I was starting to think that Jolt Cola, the soda that was completely LOADED with caffeine, was an urban legend, since people had spoken of it, but I’d never seen it before. But now I know it’s real, and it’s weird. Take a look:

Jolt Cola - it does exist!

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The combination of things people buy sometimes…

July 11, 2005, 12:08 AM

I saw what was perhaps the funniest thing on the self-checkout register today. A person bought a pack of condoms, and two different kinds of sandpaper. I’m just like, hmmmmmmm. You have to wonder about that. It leaves lots to the imagination. But if they like to sand in bed, that’s their business. Still, what cracks me up the most is the line I came up with. The couple is in bed together. He says, “So honey, do you want medium grit or fine grit tonight?”

Priceless.

Of course, the reason people buy condoms through the self-checkout in the first place is to be discreet. They don’t want anyone to know that they’re buying condoms in the first place.

This, by the way, is how retail employees have lots of fun doing their jobs. We are completely following established procedure, and laughing like heck on the inside the whole time. Person rings up condoms on the self-checkout. They put it in the bag. The self checkout machine goes off: “Item not recognized! Remove last item and try again!” So I come over. Me: “Hi, let me fix you up so you can continue.” I look into the bag (so as to visually verify that the items match their ticket). I see the condoms. I don’t say anything, but you can tell that they’re completely embarrassed by it. I’m laughing on the inside.

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Malcolm X Park: Mission Accomplished

July 7, 2005, 9:48 PM

Yes, I had a very productive time in Washington DC. Though I did get a touch of a late start. But we recovered. I ended up making up the time by hurrying along my Sheetz stop on the way up, plus traffic was lighter than usual going in. Usually I hit a considerable bottleneck from mile 41-45 on eastbound I-66, and this time, while I did encounter traffic (slowed due to construction vehicle movements), it was not as bad as I’ve seen it. So I was able to breeze right through. I still got to Vienna a touch late, but no problem.

I also finally found some background information on the I-66 construction.

At Vienna, I got a pleasant surprise – a parking spot on the top level, close to the elevator. Usually, and especially since the garage rehabilitation project began, I can only get a parking spot in the North Garage after 10:00, when the guaranteed spaces open up. So that was handy. Also, the rehabilitation work has moved once again, now encompassing the western ramp between levels. How strange it is to have that section closed off now, since that’s the ramp I usually use going up and down.

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You’ve heard of Deep Dish? This is what we call “Cheap Dish”.

June 25, 2005, 5:45 PM

Yes, tonight, dinner consists of what I call “cheap dish pizza”. In other words, Great Value is the name of the game. Store brand pizza. Whoopty-doo. Of course, on a Wal-Mart income, that’s what it’s about. Still, that ought to be pretty good.

Meanwhile, Mom’s been organizing and rearranging things in my bathroom lately. I have two words for it: BAD IDEA. She completely rearranged all the stuff in my bathroom that I use on a regular basis. In fact, it’s been in the same place for so long in there that I can reach for it all while still half-asleep (and sometimes do end up doing just that). So Mom rearranged. A big handful of my Q-tips ended up in a container on top of the toilet. My blue toiletry tote that sits on the counter and contains all my toiletries was missing, and the contents scattered all around the bathroom. My toothbrush was in a holder elsewhere in the bathroom. My flosser was in there, too. My deodorant was in the closet. So was my dental floss on a string. And then while the flosser was in the aforementioned holder (that had always been known for being downright nasty), the floss clips that fit it were in the closet. All on different shelves all over the bathroom. And my toiletry tote was in the bottom of the closet, empty.

Needless to say, this rearrangement of my stuff without even so much as telling me was not wanted nor appreciated. My Q-tips went back in the box. Q-tips are for cleaning ears, not for display. That little container went back in the closet empty. My tote came back out. And all the stuff that went in it went back into it in the proper places. Everything I needed to use regularly went back where it was before. When I am ready to rearrange, then I will rearrange. And for someone who doesn’t even use that bathroom to come in and totally rearrange it really irritates me.

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Today was a good day, though a long day.

June 13, 2005, 6:01 PM

Today was a good day. It was also a long day, but a good day nonetheless. The customers were nice, and seemed to do fairly well today on the self-checkouts, compared to a weekend, where people seem to have trouble on them.

All in all, it was quite a pleasant day. It seemed to be a long day, too, but it was a good day. And we were comfortably busy. Not bad.

And then otherwise, I realized that I’m nearly two weeks late writing this month’s newsletter. I guess with everything going on lately it just totally slipped my mind. Well, I’m going to rectify that just as soon as I finish this Journal entry.

Today was also an interesting head-music day for me. I had the weirdest songs floating through my head today. I had Marzipan’s scroll buttons song running through my head. I had the Crying Kitten song in my head today. I had the I Love You Kitten song stuck in my head. I had Yatta playing on a loop in my head. Today just seemed to be a day for all the different “Internet Songs” to take over my mind.

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I can’t believe it’s been a year…

June 5, 2005, 8:09 PM

I can’t believe it’s been a year since the June 5 anti-war demonstration sponsored by ANSWER Coalition. I can’t get over that it’s been that long.

Goodness… I remember that day like it was yesterday. I remember being excited, but a little bit nervous, since it would be my first time as a true participant, vs. the previous one where I’d stayed on the sidelines the whole time.

I wrote about the June 5 demonstration in the Journal back in June 2004, and it’s good reading. I still regret packing Big Mavica for that demonstration, as all the photos I took were taken with my cell phone. It was a good day temperature-wise, as the rain that fell that day cooled things off a bit.

After the march, I found myself near the Woodley Park-Zoo/Adams Morgan station. I visited a nearby McDonald’s, where other participants in the march went afterwards, and I also helped out a girl who was in tears because she was stranded by her boyfriend in DC, hundreds of miles from home (she was from the Virginia Beach area). I provided comfort, and help. She was nice. I hope things worked out for her in the end.

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“Weekend” doesn’t just mean Saturday and Sunday, you know…

May 17, 2005, 5:44 PM

You know, a weekend is a state of mind, and not necessarily two specific days. My weekend is usually Wednesday and Thursday, and like most people for Saturday and Sunday, I’m so glad when those two days roll around.

It’s interesting how that mindset is, too. If you call Wednesday and Thursday your weekend, then it’s your weekend! So many people at work complain about not getting weekends off, yet you don’t ever hear a peep out of me. My weekend just doesn’t happen to match with the days traditionally designated as weekends. I’ve in fact asked not to be scheduled off on traditional weekend days because I like my mid-week weekend.

So I normally start my week out on Friday, and so Friday is like Monday to me. So the traditional weekend is like Tuesday and Wednesday in my week. Then my “Friday” is actually Tuesday. So for me, today was like Friday, where I know that if I can make it through the day, I get two days of freedom from that big, green building known as Wally World (our store, for those not familiar, is tan and green instead of the normal gray and blue).

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Categories: Myself, Walmart

You’ve got to do the voice correctly…

April 22, 2005, 10:46 PM

It seems I can always find a way to make fun of the cigarette register at Wal-Mart (where the customers can’t hear me, of course). I had the term “vice counter” back a few weeks ago, and now I’ve got a new one. I hold up two fingers as if holding a cigarette, and then in my best lifetime-of-smoking voice, say the slogan for a cigarette brand. It really cracks people up, and makes people laugh OUT LOUD when I do that voice.

Imagine me doing a smoker voice, and pretending to hold a cigarette, saying something like “Come to Marlboro Country”, “We built the House of Menthol” (Kool), and, the one that gets the most laughs by far in the smoker voice, “You’ve come a long way, baby!” (Virginia Slims)

The things I come up with… it even surprises me sometimes.

Categories: Walmart

I still don’t understand…

April 21, 2005, 4:51 PM

I still don’t understand how I managed to get a screw lodged in my tire on Tuesday. I must have run over it somewhere between Wal-Mart and home on Tuesday, since the tire was in good shape when I went to work on Tuesday, and it was in good shape when I left work on Tuesday. And I had no problems on the ride home. Then on Wednesday morning leaving for work, the tire was deflated.

So we ended up rearranging the cars in the driveway, and I took Sis’s car to work. Her car has air conditioning. My car, you see, had air conditioning at one time. It no longer works, along with a whole bunch of other things on that car. Once I find a real job in DC, getting a new, smaller car is on my list of priorities.

Still, on my lunch break today, I took the car around to Tire and Lube Express (TLE), and I picked it up after work. I got a new tire on it, and so now the car is happy again. It was also nice to not have to walk practically halfway across town to get to my car after work, which is where associates normally park for work. I just paid for my tire and then slipped out through TLE.

Meanwhile, one of my coworkers told me on Tuesday that I was driving slowly coming to work. And this on a day when I was pushing it on speed. Thus now we have nicknames for each other. I say, “Hey, speedy!” and they say, “Hey, slowpoke!” I’m just tickled by the whole thing, since I was in a hurry that particular morning that I got told I was driving slowly.

So all in all, life is interesting.

Categories: Driving, Toyota Previa, Walmart

I got a compliment…

April 12, 2005, 7:02 PM

Today, as I was clocking out for lunch, I found this on a paper by the time clock:

Cashier Ben – phone call from customer – friendliest associate in store – would wait in his line no matter how long.

That absolutely made my day, you know that? That put the spring in my step, and I was just tickled pink. It’s always good to know that someone appreciates you.

Categories: Walmart